A beginner-friendly guide for moms dealing with real freelance clients (with a few hard lessons from my inbox)
- My First Client and My First Mistake
- How to Set Clear Expectations (Without Feeling Bossy)
- Sample Email Templates (Estimates, Delivery Notes, and Price Talk)
- Confidence Grows With Every Conversation
My First Client and My First Mistake
Let’s just say… my first freelance client taught me more than any blog post ever could.
Not because it was a perfect experience.
But because it was messy, confusing, and full of “I wish I had said something” moments.
I still remember the email:
“Hi, we found you on [social media platform]. Are you available for a small project?”
My heart raced.
I had no rate sheet. No process. No idea how long the project would take.
But I said yes.
Too quickly.
And that yes — kind, enthusiastic, people-pleasing — came back to haunt me.
Why this post matters
When you’re just starting out — especially as a mom juggling nap times, dishes, and deadlines — dealing with real clients can feel overwhelming.
You’re not just creating work anymore. You’re negotiating expectations, setting limits, and protecting your time.
And no one hands you a manual.
This post is the manual I wish I had back then.
We’re going to walk through:
- How to clearly set expectations (without sounding demanding)
- Real email examples you can copy-paste (or tweak)
- How to build professional boundaries (and still sound nice)
- Red flags to watch for (yes, they exist)
- And how to say “no” — firmly, kindly, and with zero guilt.
But first, let me tell you what went wrong with that first client.
What I messed up (so you don’t have to)
I didn’t ask for a deadline.
I didn’t confirm a rate — I just said something vague like, “Around XX yen is okay.”
I didn’t define what was included — so when the client kept sending more revisions, I kept saying yes.
By the end, I had:
- Worked 3x the hours I expected
- Earned far less than minimum wage
- Felt totally burnt out
The worst part?
I didn’t even resent the client. I was mad at myself — for not speaking up.
And that’s what I want to change for you.
You’re not “difficult” for asking questions
In Japanese culture, especially as women and mothers, we’re often taught to “read the air,” go with the flow, and avoid conflict.
But freelancing is a different world.
Clarity isn’t rude. It’s respectful.
Clients actually want you to be clear — it makes their life easier too.
In the next sections, I’ll show you exactly how to do that.
Step by step, word by word — in plain, friendly English.
Because the truth is:
Confidence doesn’t come before you start talking to clients.
It comes from talking to them.
Mistakes and all.
Let’s keep going — and I’ll show you how I found my voice, one email at a time.
How to Set Clear Expectations (Without Feeling Bossy)
One of the biggest turning points in my freelance life was learning this:
Confusion costs time. Clarity builds trust.
I used to think setting expectations would scare clients away.
But actually?
It made them respect me more.
They weren’t hiring me to guess or hope I’d understand what they wanted.
They were hiring me to lead the process.
Here’s how I started doing that — even as a total beginner — and how you can, too.
🧩 Step 1: Clarify the Scope (What’s included — and what’s not)
Example Situation: A client asks,
“Can you help with a social media post for our new product?”
Before, I would’ve replied:
“Sure! When do you need it by?”
Now I ask:
“What exactly do you need delivered? Just the text? A graphic? How many versions?”
Why?
Because the word “help” is vague.
Your job is to translate vague into specific.
🔧 Template: Scope Confirmation Email
Hi [Client Name],
Thanks for reaching out! Before I dive in, I’d love to confirm a few quick details:
– What’s the deliverable? (e.g., one graphic, two caption options)
– What size/platform is it for?
– Do you have brand colors or tone guidelines I should follow?
– When is the ideal deadline?Once I have this info, I can give you a clear timeline + estimate 😊
Looking forward to working with you!
Best,
[Your Name]
You can copy this, tweak it, or even turn it into a Notion template like I did.
🗓 Step 2: Be Specific About Deadlines
Clients often say things like:
“Sometime next week”
“By the end of the month”
“ASAP…”
You need to turn that into real dates.
Example Reply:
Just to clarify, would July 28 (Sunday) work as a delivery date?
I’ll schedule the draft for July 25, so you have time to review.
By doing this:
- You set the pace
- You show you’re organized
- You reduce last-minute surprises
And if something comes up on your side (kids get sick, life happens), you’ve already built a buffer.
💰 Step 3: Talk About Money Early
This one used to scare me the most.
I felt awkward saying my rate. I was afraid they’d say “too expensive” or ghost me.
But if you wait too long, you end up doing unpaid work by accident.
When to bring up payment:
- Right after the scope is clear
- Before any work starts
- Before any file is sent
🔧 Template: Simple Estimate Message
Based on the project details, my rate for this would be XX yen.
That includes:
– One main version
– Two rounds of revisions
– Final delivery as a PNG + editable Canva fileLet me know if that sounds good, and I’ll get started right away!
If you want to look extra professional, you can attach a PDF quote.
I just use Canva or Google Docs with a simple table.
📝 Step 4: Define the Revision Policy
This was another rookie mistake I made:
I didn’t say how many changes were included.
So clients assumed they could request unlimited tweaks.
Now, I include a sentence like this in every email:
“This includes up to 2 rounds of revisions. After that, additional edits will be quoted separately.”
It’s friendly, clear, and fair.
And if the client pushes back? That’s a red flag (more on that in the next section!).
💡 Quick Tip: Repeat Back What You Heard
Clients feel safe when they know you understood them.
Try ending your message with a quick summary like:
Just to recap —
– One Instagram graphic with two caption options
– Deadline: July 28
– Includes two rounds of revisions
– Rate: ¥8,000 totalDid I get everything right?
It’s such a small thing, but it builds MASSIVE trust.
Because now they know you’re listening — and that you’re in control.
🤝 Bonus: When the Client Isn’t Clear Either
Sometimes, even the client doesn’t know what they want.
This happens a lot with small businesses or solo founders.
They might say something like:
“We want to boost engagement, maybe post more stuff… just make it look good?”
When this happens, ask:
- “What’s your goal for this post — clicks, saves, shares?”
- “Can you show me one example you liked?”
- “Do you want help choosing what to post, or just help creating it?”
Don’t be afraid to lead the conversation.
They’ll appreciate your initiative — and probably come back again.
Sample Email Templates (Estimates, Delivery Notes, and Price Talk)
— The messages I actually send to clients (and how they sound human, not robotic)
If you’re like me, writing client emails used to take forever.
I’d overthink every word:
– “Does this sound too direct?”
– “Am I being too casual?”
– “Should I use emojis or not?? 😬”
The truth is, you don’t need perfect grammar or business-school phrasing.
You just need to sound like a clear, kind, and reliable person.
So in this chapter, I’m handing you the real email templates I use now — and wish I had years ago.
Feel free to copy, customize, or save them to your Notion for future use.
📨 1. Quoting a Project (Simple Estimate)
When to use it: After a client reaches out with basic info, and you’re ready to send your rate.
Hi [Client Name],
Thanks for sharing the project details!
Here’s a quick estimate for what you described:
– Deliverable: [e.g. Instagram graphic + caption]
– Includes: [e.g. 1 design + 2 rounds of revisions]
– Timeline: [e.g. Draft by July 25 / Final by July 28]
– Total Fee: ¥XX,000 (incl. tax)
Let me know if that works for you!
If everything looks good, I’ll go ahead and block time in my schedule.
Best,
[Your Name]
🔸 Why it works: Friendly tone, clear scope, no surprises.
📎 2. Delivering the Final Work
When to use it: You’ve finished the work and are ready to hand it over.
Hi [Client Name],
Here’s the final version of the [project name] — thanks so much for your feedback along the way!
🧾 Files:
– [link or attachment]
– [backup format, if applicable]
Let me know if you have any final comments. This includes up to 2 rounds of light tweaks if needed!
Once you’re happy, I’ll send over the invoice.
Thanks again — it’s been great working with you!
Warmly,
[Your Name]
🔸 Bonus tip: I like to include a note like
“Let me know if you’d like help with future posts too — happy to support your next launch!”
This gently opens the door to ongoing work.
💸 3. Negotiating a Rate (Kindly Holding Your Line)
When to use it: A client says your price is too high, or asks for a discount.
Hi [Client Name],
Thanks for your message! I totally understand wanting to stay within budget.
My standard rate for this type of work is ¥XX,000, which includes time for revisions, file prep, and client support throughout the project.
If that’s outside your range right now, I can suggest a lighter option (e.g., fewer revisions or a shorter deliverable) to fit your budget — let me know!
Either way, I really appreciate your interest and would love to stay in touch for future opportunities.
Best,
[Your Name]
🔸 Why it works: You stay firm and respectful. You offer options, not discounts.
⛔️ 4. Saying “No” to a Project (Without Burning Bridges)
When to use it: You can’t take the job — or it’s not the right fit.
Hi [Client Name],
Thanks so much for thinking of me!
At the moment, I’m fully booked and wouldn’t be able to give this project the attention it deserves. So I’ll have to pass this time.
If you'd like, I can recommend a few other freelancers who might be a good fit!
Wishing you the best with the project, and hope our paths cross again soon.
Warmly,
[Your Name]
🔸 Pro tip: Always keep the door open — you never know who they’ll refer you to next time.
💬 5. Asking for Feedback / Testimonials
When to use it: After a successful project — great for building credibility if you don’t have a portfolio yet!
Hi [Client Name],
I really enjoyed working on [project name] with you — thanks again for the opportunity!
If you’re happy with how things turned out, would you mind sharing a short comment or testimonial I could use on my website or proposal deck?
Something simple is totally fine — just a few lines about the experience!
Appreciate it either way, and hope to work with you again in the future 🙂
Best,
[Your Name]
🔸 Why it matters: Testimonials build trust. Even a one-line comment can help you land your next job.
📎 Extra Tip: Use Gmail “Canned Responses” or Notion Snippets
I keep all my templates saved in Notion with tags like:
- 🔹 Estimate
- 🔹 Delivery
- 🔹 Feedback
- 🔹 Saying No
That way, I don’t write from scratch every time — just copy, paste, and personalize.
Confidence Grows With Every Conversation
— Boundaries, Red Flags, Rate Raises, and Learning to Trust Yourself
🚧 Setting Boundaries Without Feeling Mean
When I first started freelancing, I said yes to everything:
- Last-minute requests
- Weekend deadlines
- “Can you just add one more thing?”
Why?
Because I thought being flexible meant being professional.
But in reality, it just meant I was exhausted.
Here’s what I finally learned:
You can say no kindly.
You can set limits gently.
And you can still be a joy to work with.
💬 Real phrases that helped me draw the line:
- “I’m happy to do that — here’s the additional cost and updated timeline.”
- “That would be outside the original scope, but I can send you a quick quote.”
- “I’m not available for weekend work, but I can deliver by Monday morning.”
Each time I used these lines, I held my breath…
And guess what?
Most clients said:
“Oh, no problem — just let me know the cost!”
No one was mad.
No one thought I was rude.
In fact, it made me look more experienced and organized.
🚩 Red Flags I Now Watch For
Not all clients are good clients.
And the sooner you spot the warning signs, the easier your life becomes.
Here are a few I’ve learned to walk away from:
| Red Flag | Why It’s a Problem |
|---|---|
| “We don’t have a clear idea yet, but can you start anyway?” | Vague scope = endless edits. |
| “We can’t pay much now, but there’s more work later!” | Future promises don’t pay bills. |
| “Can we hop on a call in 10 minutes?” | Disrespect for your time. |
| “We don’t usually pay upfront — hope that’s okay.” | 🚨 Just…no. Always get something in writing. |
The first time I said no to a red-flag client, I felt nervous.
But then another, better client came along.
Every time I protect my energy, it creates space for something better.
📈 When (and How) to Raise Your Rates
I used to think raising rates required a big moment.
Like “I need to be more skilled” or “I have to have a huge portfolio.”
But I realized:
You raise your rates because your time and energy are limited — and your work delivers value.
You don’t have to make a huge jump all at once.
Try this script:
Hi [Client Name],
As of [next month], I’ll be updating my rates to better reflect the time, quality, and care I put into each project.
For similar projects moving forward, the new rate will be ¥XX,000.
I’ve loved working together, and I hope we can continue on future projects too!
Best,
[Your Name]
Good clients won’t be shocked.
Great clients will say, “You deserve it.”
And if someone walks away because of it? That’s okay too.
Your rate is a filter. Not everyone is your client.
🌱 You Grow By Doing, Not Just Reading
I read dozens of blogs, watched YouTube videos, and bookmarked client scripts.
But the real growth happened when I:
- Sent my first nervous estimate
- Had my first uncomfortable price conversation
- Said “I’m not available this weekend” and meant it
You don’t need to be perfect.
You just need to be present and willing to learn from each message, each mistake, each win.
Confidence is not something you wait for.
It’s something you build — email by email, client by client.
🎁 Wrap-up: What I Hope You Take From This
To all the moms, creatives, and freelancers out there who feel small when talking to clients:
You are allowed to protect your time.
You are allowed to charge for your work.
You are allowed to say no.
And you don’t have to sound like a robot to be professional.
Your warmth, clarity, and honesty are your best assets.
Don’t hide them — let them shine in your emails, your conversations, your contracts.
The more you talk to real clients, the more you’ll realize:
They’re just people too.
And your voice — even the imperfect, unsure version — is worth listening to.
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